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‘The door is open…why can’t I walk through it’ by Charlie.


Reported by Charlie

Published on Monday, May 17th, 2021

Covid 19 Isolation
Blogs

‘The door is open…why can’t I walk through it’ by Charlie.


Written by Charlie

Published on Monday, May 17th, 2021

Covid 19

Isolation

Charlie writes about his struggle to define the strange feeling of anxiety he is experiencing at the prospect of rejoining the rat race. At the end of the day lockdown was difficult but you get used to things a certain way. Many of us thought it would just be great to be given back our freedom and perhaps it would have been a lot easier to adjust  if the lockdown had lasted for a couple months rather than the best part of 12.. It’s been a strange old year but even if we have beaten the virus Charlie reminds us that this pandemic is far from over. Mat Amp [Project Coordinator] 
Freedom. coming out of lockdown. dancing in the streets, people running ’round with their hands held high – NOT. It’s more of a whimper than a bark.
After more than a year in forced incarceration or lockdown, the shackles are off – or are they?
I don’t know about you, but I’m full of different emotions and thoughts. Over the year I’ve let things slip. In the old days they would of called it a lack of self care, now it seems the norm. Not a lot, just instead of showering once a day, it’s now every other day, shaving every two or three days, getting up a little later and not always getting dressed.
Maybe I have let my standards slip. I mean when I had a zoom meeting, I was always washed and dressed, respectable. Now into the twilight zone. I’m now having that difficulty making that move into going out again. Don’t know why – I can’t quite put my finger on it. I’ve got no fear factor about going out or mixing round other people, it’s not that. Okay I’ve got lethargic (some say lazy, I prefer lethargic). I always got things done in lockdown, in time (my time). But always got it done.
Maybe it’s all of the above, that’s given me this uneasy feeling, but I don’t think so. I thought I would be smiling, jumping for joy, instead it’s just a dull thud but I know I’m not the only one feeling like this. As I said it’s strange

Written by Charlie


Charlie Radbourne has more than six years, peer support and advocacy experience. Sitting on many service user forums and local authority committees. Due to mental health problems, coming under CMHT and the crisis team, Charlie spent eight months sleeping rough and in the local night shelter, then four years in a hostel / supported accommodation.

Read all of Charlie's articles

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Covid 19 Isolation